First Page
by ps01032160198913
Summary: Was it possible to have met the love of your life and lose her all on the same day? Would it be romantic or was it just a mere tragedy? Perhaps it was both. At least, for him, it was - both romantic and tragic, and far too possible and much too real. (One-shot)


**Let's just say this is for Thanksgiving (even though not really, I just feel like writing) but I've wanted to allow myself to write something really really truly cliche at least twice or five times in a lifetime. So, here you guys. A cliche one-shot Ezria story. Yep. (Also, I am in the midst of writing my next story so don't worry about that)**

**- Queen**

* * *

Was it possible to have met the love of your life and lose her all on the same day? Would it be romantic or was it just a mere tragedy? Perhaps it was both. At least, for him, it was - both romantic and tragic, and far too possible and much too real. Even up to this date, as he casually worked his way through the day, a brief thought of their nascent affair would interrupt him, stopping him from doing whatever it was he was doing at the moment, and forcing him to reminisce the day he had walked in the wrong room thus meeting her, Aria Montgomery, who was on the floor with her back against the wall, and eyes staring blankly across the room, ignoring his presence, as if he was just an extension of the white hospital wall.

"Can I help you?" She finally spoke, not bothering to look at him.

Ezra opened his mouth a bit, then closed it and instead gestured at the folder he was holding. "I take it you're not Matthew-" He glanced at the folder and read the patient's last name. "Edelman."

"Not today, no." She replied, her eyes still fixated somewhere else, but if she were looking at him, she would have caught his mouth twitching into a reluctant smile.

Ezra tipped his head forward. "Right. My apologies. I meant to go to room 210, not 201." He explained. "I'm occasionally dyslexic as you are occasionally Matthew Edelman." He joked and this time she raised her eyes at him, and this action of hers gave him a sense of relief like he was finally worth it - her acknowledging his presence visually. And he wondered why it mattered so much, this stranger's approval of him. For heaven's sake, it was seven in the morning, a time far too early to be analyzing one's existence and value, let alone worrying about what someone else thought of him, someone he had just met literally a minute ago.

"Dyslexia." She let out a light laugh through her nostrils. "At least you're not terminally ill, right?" She then laughed heartily, with the infectious sound actually coming out from her small mouth emerging from the very bottom of her throat, while her head was thrown back.

Ezra swallowed hard, not entirely sure if it was appropriate to laugh with her. He thought that if he did, it would be a morbid thing to laugh at, but by not laughing, it would somehow dismay her attempt of hilarity - no matter how dark the joke. So, there he was left with an encumbering paradoxical position that she had put him in. Although it seemed that any type of response was better than no response at all, so ultimately, he decided to put on a smile for her.

"Right." Ezra simply said and nodded as she moved a bit in her small space, curling her leg closer to her body. He noticed her brow wrinkling as she shifted herself, knowing that it was to a degree a painful maneuvering for someone in her condition. "Would you feel better if I helped you up on the bed?" Ezra offered.

"No, the view's lovely from down here." Aria told him - she usually felt awful when she gave such sarcastic remarks, for she was left wondering if the recipient understood the tone, and felt even more horrible when she found out they did not.

"Oh, I don't doubt that for a second. It's one of my most cherished views, actually." He replied, causing her to smile. "However, from my personal experience, it just isn't very comfortable sitting there on the hard floor." Ezra commented and allowed himself to step into the room.

"I'm fine, really." She insisted and lifted her head up at him once again.

Ezra rubbed his forehead in distress. "You know I'd get in trouble if I just walk out on a patient-"

"I really hate that word." She cut in. _Patient._ It sounded so helpless, like an abject creature that could do nothing but rely on someone else, and that if no one was around to help them walk, or eat, or breathe then they were essentially useless to a life they once had.

Ezra pressed his lips and glanced behind him then focused back on the girl on the floor. "Well, what would you like me to address you as?"

"Aria." She answered.

"Well, Aria..." He said, welcoming her name with his own voice, and quietly loving how the sound of it matched well with her face - both were outlandish. "I'd still get in trouble if I do leave you there on the floor. First, I'd get in trouble with my own conscience, second with the bigger man." He gestured at the ceiling, somewhere higher of position, the boss himself.

Aria furrowed her brow at him. "You're not a doctor, are you?" She wondered, aware that this was the first time she had ever seen him in this building.

"Nope. Volunteer." Ezra nodded once.

"Why would you ever want to volunteer in this place?" She asked with the hint of insult.

Ezra asked himself the same from time to time. Why did he choose to surround himself with the dying and the weak? He wanted to believe it was for an honorable cause, but the first thought that came to mind, which could be assumed as the answer with the most truth, was that he was sadistic and had wanted to find some form of self-awareness, and the idea of being alive in a place where it was least dominant, and sometimes, too painfully dominant.

"I'm here for people like you." He declared, going for the honorable answer, and promised to himself that he would feel the shame later when no one was around.

Aria let out a dry chuckle. "Yeah, right." She huffed out.

"What? You don't believe me?" He asked with an offended tone of voice.

"If you're here because you want to help people then I would have been already back on my bed without question. But yet there you are standing, talking, fibbing..." She trailed off, smoothly leaving an implication that she _did_ want to be back in her bed.

"But you insisted-" He shook his head, and advanced. Scooping her up, Ezra felt the cold touch coming from her fingertips pressed against the back of his neck as her arms wrapped around him.

As she anticipated the feel of the soft bed against her back, Aria gazed at him, studying the concentrated intent in his eyes. "You know, we don't always know what's best for us." Aria professed and soon felt the familiar texture of the white sheets against her body.

"Duly noted." He told her with a closed mouthed smile.

He looked down, keeping his eyes on her face. She could not have been over thirty years old. There was still a faint glimmer in her eyes, signifying its youth, and the lustrous need to do more with her life unlike the old whose eyes did not sparkle with much excitement, and instead filled with fatigue and some vague wisdom behind their iris. And Ezra paid heed to the details of her face; her unwrinkled skin, the light darkening around her sunken eyes still yet to be noticeable unless you were inches away from her, and her teeth - perfectly even and white, and all there. At his best guess, he would assume she was twenty five, or twenty four, something like that.

"Now go." Aria reminded him. "Before one very pissed Matthew Edelman reports you to the man and takes away your volunteer privileges."

"Oh no, my free lunches!" He whispered loudly at her, making her grin. He straightened up, still refusing to take his eyes off of her, seemingly bewitched by her existence, and if he did not know any better, he would say that he had fallen in love as well.

And that very short encounter was followed by many others, consecutively all in one day, sometimes occurring by coincidence, but most of the time, they had met again because he had planned so. However the second time they met, Aria was in a completely different mood - the opposite of the Aria he knew just two hours ago. As he entered the recreational room, a place to just relax and mimic the living by watching television, play cards, or even listen to the radio, Ezra spotted Aria sitting by herself, not doing any of those said things, instead she had placed herself farthest away from the front doors, secluded from others, and was only accompanied by the view from the large window which offered a gloomy picture of the first week of winter. But it was still morning where the snow outside was still untouched by the plow trucks or especially the jolly children, all of whom shared the tempestuous desire of designing a snowman. No, this snow was as white as the bed sheets in her room, the glistening sheen still picture perfect and uniformly astonishing.

Aria watched as cars drove around the bend, people in thick coats came and went, while the snow stayed still, unmoved and uncaring, and Aria pondered for a moment, debating with herself whether she would prefer being the car or the snow. Quite the difficult choice for her the more she thought about it - the car and its ability to go anywhere it wanted to, yet the snow rested there, comfortable and content. The people, however, were always on the verge of being both, coming, going, and staying although these people were unaware of the car that could not stop moving, unaware of the snow that could not willingly go anywhere at all.

"Nice out, isn't it?" Ezra commented as he approached her coolly.

"I wouldn't know." Aria responded embittered by the fact that she was not allowed to go outside, in the cold, for fear she could easily catch something, or worse, she could come down with pneumonia. "What do you want?" She inquired solidly.

Ezra arched his brow for a moment, taken aback by the unfriendly tone of her voice. "I just wanted to say hi, is all." He said and glanced at her. "I'm on my break."

"Wouldn't you rather spend it somewhere nice? I suppose the cafeteria or outside, there in the snow." Aria pointed out.

Sighing to himself, Ezra nodded. "I can go if you don't want to be bothered. I just thought it'd be nice to say hello." He told her once more.

Aria turned her head at him and out of her mouth came a scoff. "Are you trying to make me feel bad?" She asked accusingly, irritated now and not mainly due to his interjection or her inability to go outside, but Aria was not feeling well, to say the least, not as well as she was feeling an hour ago, anyway. And she expected for the wringing pain rounding her back would only get worse, and she also predicted it to travel up and reach her head.

"N-no." He argued. How awful to have such reputation, charging a sick person with guilt because a volunteer worker did not get his way with her. Quickly recoiling, Ezra shook his head and stepped back. "I'm gone, see? I'm sorry for disturbing you, I am." He said before walking away.

Swallowing hard, Aria clenched her jaw and continued watching the view from the blessed outside.

Ezra paced back and forth and picked his head up as soon as he heard the loud click of the door at the end of the hallway. Wren Kingston, his roommate and the doctor responsible for letting him volunteer, was heading in his direction, with a hurried speed.

"Hey, mind if I ask you something?" Ezra walked beside him, following the doctor who did not pause in his walking, but had given Ezra a nod anyway. "201, is that your section?" Ezra asked and patiently anticipated for an answer.

"No, mate, why?" Wren replied and stopped in front of a room.

"Nothing, I was just wondering if it was-"

Wren eyed him curiously. "If it was?"

"If you had a file on the patient." Ezra admitted.

"Why? Who's asking?" Wren followed up.

"Forget it. It's not important." He waved his hand nonchalantly. "I just wanted to know the patient's name without having to walk in the room and introduce myself. I just thought I knew the person. An old friend or something-" Ezra shook his head, but before he could walk off, Wren had placed his hand on Ezra's chest.

"How about this? I'll get you the file if you still want it, but first-" He conjured up another folder. "Bring this to nurse Jen, she's on the fourth floor. It would save me the damn trip. And while you do that, I'll go get that file for you."

Ezra gave a reserved smile as Wren handed him the folder. "Room 201, alright?" Ezra reminded his friend.

The brightening aura gave off the impending feel of the brisk afternoon. Families entered the building, some carrying bouquet of flowers, handpicked with alacrity, as if to mask the concluding day of their loved one, the ones lying in bed, drunken in medicine and self-pity, but there were ones who had learned to accept their demise and spent their days putting on a strong face for the hopeful visitors as it was the only thing, really quite the only good final deed they could do - sparing one's sadness for the loss they were about to suffer.

More footsteps filled the hallways, more muffled voices echoed in the rooms, and Ezra managed to appear busy, ambling about in one of the hallways with his head down, eyes glued on the file, her file. The hell with it, he thought. He could get in trouble for reading into someone's personal details, but he was only a volunteer and more importantly, was it such a crime to want to learn about someone? Someone he suddenly begrudgingly cared about, for a reason he could not fathom? Yes, he was violating a few rules here and there, but it was not as if he was attempting to rob her or stalk her family, or plot an assassination. No, he simply wanted to know the basics. Her age, her full name, her situation. And he had learned all of this within two minutes in his reading. She was in fact only twenty-five years old, all the way from Pennsylvania, and had been staying here for the past four months, the last month with less treatment. He found it odd that she would come all the way here, to another state, just to be treated. But he supposed her family wanted the best care for their first child, their only daughter, not to say that Yale Hospital had the best care, but so far it retained a good reputation, at least to his knowledge, it did.

Walking past room 201, Ezra paused and casually stepped back and saw another woman sitting by Aria's bed side, talking rather seriously. This new woman appeared to be around her age, definitely not Aria's mother nor sister as he remembered that she had no sister, only a younger brother named Michelangelo. The Montgomery family and their taste for remarkable names! Ezra's eyes lingered for longer than he intended, curious to know the visitor's identity, jealous to a certain degree - that it was not he who was was sitting beside her, comforting her if that was what she wanted.

"Hanna and Em called me the other day. They were here a few days ago, they said?" Spencer saw as Aria nodded a little, and Spencer understood her friend's need to save her energy so she spoke very little too in response to Spencer's questions. "Yeah, I thought I'd visit...they didn't give me a heads up, you know, that they were traveling here. I would have come sooner, came with them." Spencer faked a pout then smiled.

"You didn't have to come at all, Spence." Aria chimed in.

"Well, too late. I'm already here and I'm not going anywhere." She grinned widely.

"One push of a button and they'll kick you out." Aria's eyes moved downward to her hand, playfully wiggling her finger near the button that would send the nurse running to her room.

"You wouldn't!" Spencer exclaimed and the two shared a soft and comfortable laughter, Spencer's volume trumping Aria's weak one.

The cheery sound gradually subsided and the look on Spencer's face was instantly overwhelmed by the prominent recognition of her friend's illness, which not even Spencer Hastings, with all of her money and success, was able to fix. This formulated an uncomfortable and ugly spirit in Spencer, how she or anybody for that matter could not repair her childhood friend, only stall the remaining hours, or if one was ambitious, the remaining days.

"Please don't do that." Aria whispered.

Spencer creased her brow. "Do what?"

"I can hear you thinking. It's very loud and distressing, Spencer." Aria pointed out. "And I didn't peg you for a sentimentalist."

"Oh, please. We know very well that you and I are both sentimental _and_ romantic. I don't know why you still can't accept it even after all these years." Spencer leaned in, brushing her thumb over Aria's hand.

"People change." Aria argued.

Spencer shook her head. "Not wholly. It's possible they overlap who they were once, but it's still there. The authenticity of their being. Somewhere buried, hidden-like a secret. I'm not sure it goes away completely or even a little bit."

"Aren't you supposed to cheer me up?" Aria said, her tone lighter and less somber. "I am dying, after all!" She added and flashed a smile.

"Damn it, Aria. Be nice." Spencer retorted, now frowning and upset, and had pulled her hand away.

"Sorry." Aria abruptly let out. "I just don't see the point. That's all." She shrugged at her friend. "I don't know why you guys insist in thinking otherwise, pretending to have something, time or whatever when it's clear for all of us. Can't you be more like the doctor? At least, he's accepted it. I mean, really, the only one hurting you guys is yourself. Not me. I'm perfectly fine with it."

"Perfectly fine with what?" Spencer furrowed her brow. "Dying? You're perfectly fine with that?!" She raised her voice and inhaled sharply.

Licking her lips, Aria let out a long, drawn out breath. "You make it all sound so bad."

"Because it is! It's terrible! Maybe not for you, fine! Maybe not for the doctor! But what about us? The ones who aren't so used to death. We're the ones who have to live with it. Not you. No, you-you're fine because that would be it for you. You just leave and that's it. Done. No more feelings. No more looking back on anything. Just done-completely vanished from the face of the earth, without a care in the world. That's you, you get to have that privilege. But not for us, not the ones you're leaving behind. You see, we're the ones who have to wake up every day, and think about that friend who died, that daughter who passed away, that big sister. We have to deal with that! Don't you get that? That very unfair idea of you just interrupting our daily lives-your family's lives and mine, and everybody else who knew you and cared about you. So, no, don't tell me to accept this, Aria. Because that would mean agreeing to all of that, and I can't. I don't want to." Spencer crossed her arms above her heaving chest.

Aria rolled her head to the side, looking out the window, away from Spencer's glare because she knew Spencer had in fact made a very good point, but what could she possibly do about it? Be nice to them? And then what? Was happiness still really happiness even when it could not last? It seemed lovely anyhow, the memory of such feeling, but Aria did not believe in it, did not want to be fooled by the happiness that was built in false pretense, false hope, created by an empty promise. She wanted something genuine, or none at all.

"I'm only saying, you shouldn't get your hopes up." Aria finally stated.

"Hey-" Spencer said, wanting Aria to look at her. "Aria, listen-" She said as she sat on the edge of her seat and reached for Aria's hand. "I'm sorry...I just needed to yell at someone." Spencer spoke much softer now. "I lost my train ticket on the way here."

Aria shook her head and laughed shortly. "Unbelievable."

"What? They're very expensive! 29.50 for a roundtrip, can you believe that?" Spencer complained and their eyes locked and mouths exchanging in smiles. "I'm only asking you to be nice to us. Is that too much to ask?"

Aria scoffed at the seemingly ridiculous and impossible request. "Pity the living, they say." She added.

"Exactly." Spencer got up from her seat and leaned forward, leaving a light kiss on Aria's forehead. "I'm going to come back next week, okay?" She informed. "Please, _please_ get well soon. _Try. _I don't give a shit what the doctor told you."

"Don't lose your ticket." Aria plainly said without sarcasm in her undertone or disdain nor contempt, just a fair friendly reminder for a fellow friend. This was her being nice.

When the clock hit the sharp noon, Ezra began to run errands from the nurses and doctors in his vicinity. He had to stop by and check on a fellow patient, offer small talks in case they were feeling lonelier than usual. Another errand was to wheel around an elderly woman, free her from the small closed up box they called a room. However, Ezra heavily wished that one of the doctors would order him to check up on the patient from room 201. He was not given the chance to apologize, properly apologize for his action this morning, the second meeting - and he wanted to put it right. He would hate to find out that she was gone for good and that he had left a poor impression on her. He could not believe himself now, that his wanting to say sorry was also influenced by a kind of utilitarian and selfish impulse to clean up his image. But this wish was granted just around two o'clock when Ezra was told to collect and change the bed sheets in room 201.

Knocking on the door, Ezra apprehensively stepped in and scanned the empty room, and noticed the slit that the bathroom door had produced. What a shame it was, to only have this one opportunity to see her again, and she was there hiding inside the washroom, as if she knew he was coming again. Did he have to announce that he was in her room, taking the sheets? She seemed like the type who could not care less so Ezra went on, tearing the sheets from the bed and folding them neatly, subsequently placing them in a small plastic cart that he had brought along with him, all performed as leisurely as possible, in the hopes that she would come out before he had to leave.

His ears were perked up, frankly eavesdropping and he could hear the running faucet that had failed to cover the retching sound she was making. Then the sound stopped abruptly, the dynamic of the running faucet implied that she was now washing her hands. Ezra glanced for a moment then swiftly returned to place the new sheets.

"The medicine they give me is the worst." Aria declared as she stepped out of the bathroom. Eyeing him from head to toe, Aria waited until he turned around to face her.

"I'm very sorry to hear that." Ezra said in a courteous tone as he carefully tucked in the ends of the sheets.

"It's alright. It's just cancer, the incurable kind." Aria said as she approached the bed, a small laugh escaping her mouth.

Ezra pivoted on the heels of his feet, and studied her. "You have a very dark sense of humor, anybody tell you that?" He told her.

"It's this room, you know?" She excused. "Everything's already so gloomy and bland. It eats you up, turns you into one of them."

"So, are you saying you were funny once? Now, you're just funny and gloomy?"

"Poor mix, I know." She let out a sigh.

Ezra chuckled at her. "It's not so bad." He admitted and Aria looked at him steadily before smiling back. "It fits you."

"It does?" She asked, a bit surprised.

"Yeah, because you're funny and you have cancer." He said, smirking slowly, but her face fell and there came a pause, a scary one, for him. "Shit-no, I-" He stammered and stared wildly at her dejected face. This time, he was certain he had violated not only the hospital rules, but moral and ethics and all that came with it, perhaps he could even get a lawsuit for being a complete asshole, or worse, go to hell for it. "Oh shit-" He breathed out.

Aria laughed lightly and advanced to her bed. "Relax." She reassured him. "I got you really good, didn't I?"

After realizing her joke, Ezra sighed with relief. "You're sick." He said as he shook his head at her.

"I know." She smiled proudly.

"I mean, twisted kind of sick, not the incurable kind of sick even though under the circumstances, you're both." He clarified and saw her beaming face, taking note of the effort she was putting in just to have that smile.

"I know." She repeated and sat on the edge of a freshly made bed.

Licking his lips, Ezra composed himself and looked at her. "I lied, earlier...about my being here." He confessed to her as she tilted her head, giving him her attention. "I'm a writer."

"Hmm, that makes more sense." She commented.

"Oh yeah?" Ezra now positioned himself, completely facing her, just a feet away.

Clicking her tongue, Aria shifted a bit. "Yeah, literary curiosity." She declared.

Ezra arched his brow. How did she know so well about the subject? "Are you a writer as well?" He asked.

"Used to be." She revealed.

"Used to be? Once a writer, always a writer." He stated as a way to give her back some confidence.

Aria rolled her eyes. "Not when you're locked up and have no where else to go, no places or people to write about. Lack of ideas, that's what kills them and right now, I don't think I have any ideas." She pursed her lips together. She hated self-pity yet here she was, feeling bad for herself. It was just one of those things that could not be avoided. "Anyway, I suppose you're here to write about us?"

"Us?" He widened his eyes for a split second.

"The people in the building." She cleared up.

"Oh-" He chuckled nervously.

"Exploit me, why don't you?" She blinked a few times before setting her gaze on him.

"I would never think of exploiting you." Ezra said and swallowed hard before shaking his head once, his eyes now focused on the floor, embarrassed by his maudlin confession. What the hell was he getting himself into? Desiring for something-_someone_ that would not last for long, and he was sure that Aria had caught him, mindful of the feelings he was surrendering to, even if she did not exactly imply but she was smart, Ezra could safely assume she already knew what he was all about.

"Then what exactly are you writing about?" She asked seriously this time.

Ezra thought for a moment, seemingly failing to come up with an honest answer, for he did not know himself what he wanted to write about yet. There were too many concepts, too large for him to absorb it all and too complicated to just reduce into one simple answer. Death, doctors, desolation - all too broad of a topic.

"I don't know yet, to be perfectly honest." Ezra finally spoke up, rubbing his jaw with his right hand.

Aria scooted up even more, preparing to lie down. "Can you come back later? Perhaps you'll have an answer then." She offered, resulting in him smiling like a young boy given a second chance. "I'm sorry, it's just...today's been tiring." She disclosed. "I just kinda want to sleep for a bit."

"Of course." Ezra said understandingly. "I'll come by later." He promised her.

He was told or rather allowed to leave around eight in the evening. That was usually when visiting hours ended and the patients were less active, and preferred to be in bed by the doctors, to have their rest. But as the hours went, Ezra grew worried that he would not have the chance to come back again, or that she was asleep already. Just an hour ago, he spotted her parents walking out of her room. Michelangelo, however, was not around. Ezra did not know if he wanted to feel angry about her brother's lack of presence or did Michelangelo knowingly choose not to visit his only sibling, as to spare himself the grief? Either way, it was weak and selfish of him, but some people were like that and Ezra could not blame her brother for it.

After doing his last round of errands, Ezra went back to the second floor, checked the time, and managed to avoid the nurses surrounding the floor. It was a little over ten o'clock, two hours past his assigned hours. He never knew he could break so many rules and laws in one day. This young woman had captivated him, influencing him to go through such obstacles without even uttering a word to him. He had never been so indirectly in love before.

"Ezra!" Wren had called out after him from the other end of the hallway.

Ezra inhaled deeply and approached his friend. "Yeah?"

"I'm getting out in a bit. Wanna grab a few drinks before heading home?" Wren suggested as they both stood in front of the reception desk.

"Uhh-" Ezra scratched the back of his head. "I'm not sure about tonight, you know? I'm a bit exhausted."

"Well, weren't you supposed to be out two hours ago?" Wren glanced at his wrist watch then back up at him.

"Yeah, but I..." He cleared his throat. "Thought I'd extend it for a bit. Spend my free day completely."

"Would you look at that? I think you're officially a saint!" Wren half-joked and patted Ezra on the shoulder. "Just notify me when you decide to leave, yeah?"

"Will do." Ezra motioned a quick salute before turning away, proceeding to sneak off to continue on with his own not-so-saintly endeavor.

Exhaling sharply, a preparatory breath before walking into the familiar room, Ezra shut his eyes and turned the doorknob, inviting himself in - coming back as he promised. The lamplight provided enough light for the room, and there were also some coming from the machines, green and yellow colors. At this certain hour, the sound of the beeping machine had taken over the room, and Aria was in bed, sleeping or appearing to be asleep.

"Damn it." He grumbled under his breath as he studied her slow breathing, the blanket over her chest rising and falling. Feeling the cold breeze sweep through, Ezra crossed the room and closed the windows, causing a loud clicking sound coming from the hatch lock while he muttered angrily at the person who left it open, baffled by their inconsideration.

"No..." Aria's voice crept up behind him, as if she was standing right behind him.

Turning around immediately, Ezra rubbed his hands together as he walked to her. "Sorry, did I wake you?" He asked but she continued to shake her head.

"The windows-" She let out, her breathing ragged and frail. Ezra furrowed his brow at the sudden change of her voice, like she had grown decades older within the past hours when he was not with her. Was it usually like this? Quick and quiet, like a thief in the night, this sickness coming to take away someone's life? He hoped it was not in her case as he wanted to talk more to her, share more things with her, love her a little bit longer.

"It's freezing. It's not good for you." Ezra told her, determined to keep the windows closed. Sitting beside her, Ezra wore a faint scowl on his face at the sight of her. "Are you alright?" He asked, feeling supremely helpless.

"Do you-" Aria slowly shifted her body to face him, but let out a soft wince.

"Hey, hey, don't move if you're not comfortable, okay? I'm listening, even if you can't see that I am, I'm right here, okay?" He stated as Aria nodded a bit. "Okay, what were you going to tell me?"

"Do you-"

Ezra tilted his head and waited patiently. "Hmm?" He moved forward.

"Like me?" She finally said, her eyes half shut from fatigue.

Laughing softly, Ezra bowed his head bashfully. "Oh man..." He exhaled sharply while rubbing a side of his face. "You don't beat around the bush, do you?" He smiled at her then paused for a while, contemplating his answer. "I believe so. I do, very much." Ezra admitted, his blue eyes fixated on her face, noting her closed eyes.

"Don't..." Aria let out and that was all she said.

Ezra looked at her quizzically. "Don't what? Not like you?" He questioned and saw the slight movement of her head, in a nodding manner. "Why not? You shouldn't say that...telling people what they can and can't feel. It's not your right." He stated. "But why? Why shouldn't I like you?" He went on.

"Won't turn out...well..." She answered. "For you..."

Ezra swallowed hard and lightly chewed on his lower lip. "Well, that's not very fair..." He raised his eyebrows for a second then turned away to concentrate on anywhere else but her face.

No, in fact, it truly was not fair. But he supposed she had nothing to do with that, no blame to take, if anything, he should be blaming himself from the moment he felt it, when it was still avoidable. But then again, was it necessary to put the fault in anyone at all? Had he known he was going to fall for someone today, someone he could not keep, he never would have continued through it. Cowardly as it may seem, it would save him the trouble. But alas, with not much say, that was not how it happened. Life had put him here in this place, made him feel the way he felt now whenever he looked at her, exchanged words with her, even shared the same space with her, this was how he would always feel about her. And blaming was an indication of denying one's responsibility. Ezra did not want that when it came to this. If he could be responsible for one thing, in the entirety of his life, he would gladly be responsible for being in love with her.

"No future...there's no future-" Aria whispered, her voice raspy. "With me."

"I don't care." Ezra replied without hesitance. "I don't care much for future. Let's just stick with the present? How does that sound?" He smiled for her. "I mean, it's the only tense we're allowed to live in, right?" He let out a small laugh then returned to the usual solemn mood to suit her own state of mind.

After a while, with Aria lying in bed unresponsive, Ezra swallowed hard and moved closer to her. Reaching for her hand, Ezra breathed in deeply. "Say something, please. Don't go yet. Tell me a story." He pleaded as he brushed his hand with her cold one.

"Do you remember-" She made a sound that resembled a laugh. "When we used to go to the library..." She rambled on and Ezra stared at her, playing along by nodding his head, but realized that she was mistaking him for someone else now. "And you would get mad at me..."

"Why?" Ezra asked eagerly. "Why did I get mad at you? Remind me again, Aria. I don't remember vividly. You know me and my poor memory." He said enthusiastically, and it felt like he was about to unravel one of the greatest secrets about her.

"Because I would always rip out-" She paused to take a breath. "Rip out the first pages of the book."

Ezra chuckled in response. "Right. Well, it wasn't a very nice thing to do, you know?" He grinned and held her hand tightly, falling deeper and deeper into her.

"I never claimed..." She swallowed for a second before continuing. "I was nice."

Shaking his head in protest, Ezra leaned in. "But you are. You're very nice." He told her, keeping his voice down. Ezra watched her, and felt a pang of panic when she was not responding again. "Hey...hey, guess what?" He said excitedly, as if to wake her up. "I know what I'm going to write about. I know exactly what I'll write about, Aria." He intertwined his fingers with hers and kept his smile plastered on his face.

He could hear the fluttering, the irregular rhythm of her struggled breathing but it had comforted him, to know that she was still here. Ezra sighed heavily and brought her hand up to his lips, kissing the smooth skin lightly. Ezra raised his eyes at her once again, quietly observing how she slept, her lips slightly parted, and the movement of her chest would sometimes synchronize with the beeping machine just a few feet away from her head. She was still here, Ezra told himself, as long as the machine continued to beep, he did not worry about her leaving yet. Perhaps, she was going to still be here the next day, and if that did not happen, Ezra still had the capability to keep her alive, in some shape or form, through a story that he would write or simply through his own memories which seemed abundant enough, he could think of more ways to make her stay, anything at all to keep her.


End file.
